This Ain't The Summer of Love

Hello hello hello. And how are all my old droogies back in the city of heat and pain. Greetings from lovely Dobb's Town. The air here is cool and fresh, and so am I.

No no, I'm not returning to Tucson, not with all the topless Bobbies around here, waiting on the SubG's hand and foot. No, my Nenteliffe got word to me that there have been some serious changes in the city so I figured I'd wire one in and ask all of you my favorite question:

What the hell are you idiots thinking?!

Steven goes bug happy and starts lighting his party with Sabbat; ok, not your fault but you could have rose up en mass or something. But not you clowns. So he get bored and blows town; and only then, when he's on his way out the door does somebody try to off the greasy bastard. I know almost all the vamps in the city are white, but that's some of the worst timing I've ever seen. O.K., so who's gonna be Prince now? Wait! Who says there needs to be a Prince, didn't you clowns ever listen to me?! Wait, of course not, that's why I sold your asses out to Steven last year. O.K. so who do you go for? Alex Crammer. On the surface, not a bad choice. A basically nice person who rarely participates in head bashing or other psycho activities. On the surface. Dig a little deeper. He's a Nosferatu, the only clan more secretive than the Tremere, so secretive in fact no one is even sure what side of the Camarilla/ Sabbat war they're on. And he makes "Enemies Lists". You really shouldn't trust any one who borrows pages from Nixon.

But wait, there's more. Not only do you get a secretive, enemy obsessed Prince (or maybe he's a Bishop, and you don't even know it!). No, he hires (no there's an interesting term to use with Camarilla offices) an Assamite Sheriff. Remember that stuff I said about the Nosfer being the only guys more secretive.... Forget it, these clowns are even more secretive. Hack hack, chop chop, kill kill. They don't bother with enemy lists, they kill everybody, so long as the price is right. Killers for hire. What great cops they make. Have any of you ever read Judge Dredd? Well these guys don't have that much cool hardware, but they also don't have any silly morals to get in the way.

Well, it's good to know you people are just as pathetic without me around as you were last year. I had begun to worry that maybe I was a bad influence on you. I'd love to stay and berate you some more, but the last three years worth of Swedish bikini teams are at my house with three quarts of massage oil and 700 cubic feet of cellophane.

"And trust me when I tell you 
That slack comes in between				Fritz Jager
Indeed the slackiest Jew I ever knew
Displayed to slack that was always true
It ain't no mystery
It's just a little bit of history
Slack's been around as long as earth
In fact slack's as old as dirt."
	Shut D Fonk Up
	-Dr. John

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